Investment

To save my back for the future, I broke down and got an umbrella stroller for the trip. Walmart special...under $20 including taxes. Hopefully it's worth it.

My back was getting sore just thinking of running haphazardly through the airport with Matthew in my arms (or on my back) stopping and picking up accidentally dropped items every 10 meters. All this done while the last call is being made YET AGAIN for me to make it to my next flight...

Nathan thinks it's a ripoff that he's too heavy for the stroller. Growing older is hard!

more veggies and nuts, less fruits for snack

midwife's orders:
(actually, she'd say not peanut butter, but peanuts instead. and no raisins--they're much too high in sugar!)

Recipe for Bugs on a Log:
celery cut into logs
peanut butter for sap/glue
raisins for bugs...any kind of bug you like...mine were ladybugs and ants and Nathan's were centipedes


Yup, I had a checkup today. I'm gaining weight nicely--nicely for the baby anyways, not as nicely for my modeling career perhaps. But I'm sure that's nothing a crash diet can't fix once the baby is out. Heehee. ;)

I had fun fiddling around with some pregnancy calculators. I'm obese, by the way. But only by 1 pound. If I was 1 pound less pre-pregnancy, then I'd be allowed to gain 25-35 pounds. But alas, I am over the mark, so only 15-25 is considered healthy for me. Actually--that's all true for last pregnancy. This time I WASN'T obese. Lucky me. But that also means I've only got 6 more lbs of healthy weight gain 'til mid November. I'm sure that's gonna happen. ;) Too bad I don't believe the calculators...time to go have another slice of double chocolate mousse pie, followed by an extra creamy strawberry milkshake.
Mmmm.
Too bad there's none in the house.

But seriously, the baby appears to be quite healthy. Yay! And so am I(BMI and pregnancy weight gain calculators disregarded). But I have a bit of heartburn just now. No more tomatoey soups for lunch I guess. *sigh* It was soooo healthy though. Baby just loved it.

A dilemma

My dilemma is this:
If I pack today, I won't be able to sleep tonight.
If I wait 'til tomorrow, Philip won't be able to sleep tonight.
Who should I torture? Myself, or him?

I guess if I weigh things; he gets two kids, I get one (unless you count jr?).
He gets to work while I'm gone, I get to have fun.
Hmmm.
Maybe I'll pack today.
After all, it is fun to be hyper. ;)

Something is not right!

In the middle of the night
Miss Clavel turned on the light
and said, "Something is not right!"

As usual, life with kids has ups and downs.

Life has ups and downs without kids too...but there's no way for me to know that for certain. Things in my domain cycle from
Fantastic!
to
"Something is not right!"
usually for me life requires the "turning on of the light" for me to notice just how bad things are. Today the light is on.
I saw it flicker yesterday:
Melanie was sitting sedately in her booster seat sometime in the afternoon.

Maybe she'd been coloring? I don't know.
But suddenly she bangs her hand up and down on the table and YELLS
"You be quiet and listen to me NOW!"


(Now who's horrible lack of manners, respect and love could she possibly be imitating SO precisely, we wonder?)


That was just a glimmer. Today she was much worse.

Potty training, which I thought was complete (she has the odd accident every week or so, but otherwise perfect), was a COMPLETE disaster today. COMPLETE. Probably nothing went where it should have today.
By the time I tucked her in bed for the night, I felt my voice was strained.
From YELLING. Yes, yelling.
And my body drained.
From ANGER.
That is terrible.

It has come to that.
For a while now.
Once again.

So what's the next step?
I guess it will be to once again go back on my knees
and admit I just can't do it.
I need help.
Tonnes of it.

Time to, once again, realize that these are God's children, not mine.

Time to respect them (again).

Time to love them (again).

Time to stop loving myself quite quite so much (AGAIN!!).

I need to spend some time, once again, trying to figure out what each of them needs. Spend GOOD time with them, not just guilt laden pretend good time.
If I start this way, hopefully, they'll start listening better...
because I'll be listening better!

Then maybe I won't feel like yelling anymore.

Part of the reason things have deteriorated this much just now, I suspect, is because of the forthcoming trip. It's hard to focus on here when I'm thinking of there.

If the older two really get so bad, what does it matter? I can fix it when I get back, right?
Or Daddy can fix it while I'm gone!
(evil cackles)

Yup, I have been full of horrible attitudes lately. But now I'm truly sorry for it.

First I must be mended,
then I'll have a hope with the kids.

Almost silent videos

Here is a rather amateur tribute to Charlie Chaplin done by my less than professional offspring:

Barrettes

Barrettes go in the hair.
Dead batteries go in the garbage.
Mommy Roze should go to bed.
But maybe the kids should go first.

Party park protest

There was a park redone a little farther away from "our" park. It's handicap accessible, it has a splash pad, and it's got brand new play equipment. It used to be the park where the teenagers hung out, smoked, and had an occasional drink. Now they've moved to our park, since it's less popular and more isolated.

"OK kids,
keep your shoes on so you don't get glass cuts on your feet.
Don't pick up the broken bottles so you don't cut your fingers.
Don't touch those cigarette buds so you don't get sick.
Have fun!"

(You can see an empty 24 box of Lakeport beer sticking out of the garbage can. It's a shame that only 3 or 4 of the empty bottles made it in the garbage too.)

The kids still have fun





but I think I might contact the city parks dudes and complain...see if there's anything they can do to make sure it doesn't get worse, or perhaps prevent further partying. Or just promote responsible partying.

Mommy monster

Run while you can!

Another summer sick day

Isn't summer the time to be healthy and energetic, and when you get stuff done? Too bad for us if it is...we're not with the times. Matthew has a bad cough and is rather lethargic again today. Sometimes he has trouble getting all the phlegm out of the way. Poor guy. I'm sure I'd feel MUCH MUCH more sorry for him if he hadn't woken me up so much last night for the same complaint. After all, I have the same ailments as him, and no one is catering to me!

Melanie was willing to dote on him for a while though...so I at least got my morning vacuum done. (We won't have to pick rice, playdough, and other unrecognizable items off of the bottoms of our feet every few seconds.)

Hopefully he has a super dooper long nap this afternoon and wakes up feeling chipper again. If he woke up at 5, or 6 even, when Daddy gets home, I won't get upset. ;)

Two by to

Now you can Mommy Roze's waking-up-from-naptime face too!

Aren't I cute?

Two weeks and Matthew and I will be sitting in a plane and leaving my other two munchkins and hubby behind! It's kind of a scary thought. But I'm in a daze this week, so it's not scaring or exciting me at the moment--and that is DEFINATELY a good thing, since I'm emotionally unstable enough these days without anything exciting going on. Maybe I'll be able to stay stable for a while, and have dry eyes for a few weeks...MAYBE.

These two weeks, I thought, would be really really long. So I've booked a few social get togethers...maybe that'll pass the time. Maybe I can see a close friend again, who will be back next week!! Would be great to have a good chat with her too--I've been missing a good chat with her and my sis-in-law gone...and everyone else being ever so far away. You'd think I'd just pick up the phone...but I only do that rarely these days 'cause it just isn't the same and it's lost a bit of its glow on me...not sure why. Maybe these two weeks will fly by though, since, after all, when did time go slow? Always I'm going "It's Friday already? What about all these (here I should add a list of thirty seven thousand and twelve or so) things I was planning to get done this week?" I don't take the kids grocery shopping anymore either. I gave up. It was too hard. I quit. They were getting too hyper and uncontrollable. So now I go by myself in the evening, which only adds to my feeling of distance and helps me loose my feeling of understanding how the schedule of time passing. Is it really July already? It must still be May...or June. We've only had one killer hot week, so my body, I guess, doesn't believe it's midsummer already. Oh well...maybe I'll step outside and mindlessly pick some mulberries. That's so much easier than trying to figure out which of my thirty seven thousand and eleven or so remaining things is the most important to do just now.

Life with your arm around me

That's Melanie's waking-up-from-naptime face.


Nathan's goofball-fooling-around-when-I-have-the-camera face.


"It's okay if I wear my fire shirt now 'cause it's summer this year now, right?"


"Peanut butter." (That one is really really getting old now.)


Beautiful mulberry toes. I guess I could wash their feet everytime they come in from playing outside...but they'd still have a purple tinge to them...so I don't bother. :o

"I can put my arm around Melanie just like you put your arm around Daddy at church, right Mom?"

"Why do you put your arm around Daddy?"

"Because I love him."

"You don't mind if I put my arm around you, right Melanie? Is it okay?"

(she nods)

Park day

After such a busy week, it's time we took a day to relax at the park. They never seem to object to that...

It's sure nice having a giant sandbox as part of the park!

I did have to break up three fights over Nathan's special big shovel, though. Too bad for them we don't have three of them...but hey, learning to share is something that might just maybe possibly perhaps come in handy one day in the distant future for them. Either way, it's banned from coming next time. Poor shovel.



Maybe I can retire from swing pushing permanently? Too bad he can't lift her up onto it too!


Since our camping trip, Matthew's been much more willing to walk on "rugged" terrain. That is, on anything that isn't perfectly flat. He does the sand in the park fantastically now!

And he loves the hill! It actually has a pretty good incline--which the photo doesn't capture. He knows how to do the up and the down. What a big boy! (sniff sniff)


It is so much fun to run!

Life's a big party.

Melanie (who at the moment is wailing away in her bed because she wanted a bath this evening, but it wasn't on the schedule...) just LOVES going out. She's the only one who doesn't object to going to church FIVE mornings in a row. She doesn't think it is fair that VBS ends tomorrow--why can't it go on forever?

She chats all about her girlfriends when she gets home, telling me which ones didn't behave, and what they all did together in the babysit. Where did she get her social skills from?

School Days

A lot of people ask if Nathan is going to school in September. The first few times I was shocked and thought:"My biggest Baby ready for school? Never! He's far to young still!" After looking at these pics though, I think perhaps he isn't a baby anymore.

So this week, he is going to school. Vacation Bible School, actually. He was sure excited to go, and had been looking forward to it for several weeks!

What a crazy busy week it is, and VBS is only in the mornings--not even full days. I'm the designated craft person, and am the head honcho in the craft room. We have hammers and nails hiding in the storage room, so no one messes with me! :p